Category: Uncategorized

Put On by Young Jeezy ft. Kanye West

What’s the disease called where you have to do certain things a certain way and in your head if you don’t your whole family dies? I think it’s OCD.

Anyways.

Back in high school, I started this pregame routine before every game. I had to listen to the same four songs all at certain times during my warmup.

One was Country Shit by Big Crit ft. Ludacris. I’d play it as soon as the car parked and I was on the way to the stadium. Right after was this banger up above. I’d play it right as I walked in the tunnel.

I could listen to whatever for a while, but as soon as I started to head to the locker room I’d play Kush Coma by Danny Brown ft. A$AP Rocky. Lastly I’d play Attak by Rustie ft. Danny Brown as I was putting on my pads.

I had to pause the last song at 3 seconds. If all of this didn’t happen, I’d spiral.

Same routine for 8 years straight.

It’s hard to mimic that routine in my current life. I don’t hype myself up for a call, but I have enough intermural sports in my life nowadays that let me relive some of my athletic days. It wasn’t so much the game. Don’t get me wrong, I loved being in the moment, but there was so much more that went into it. The pregame routines, the locker room banter, everything.

Those little things add up enough to where you can reminisce on all of it when it’s all said and done.

My boy and I had a HUGE game against another undefeated team tonight in pickleball. I had to dial it back and go back to my roots.

I had this song playing as if I was getting ready for Game 7 of the world series, slapping the whiffle ball against the wall like my life depended on it. It was fun to get back in that zone. I don’t get to do it often anymore.

We swept, 3-0.

Drip or Drown by Gunna

I’ve been sitting on this one for a while. One of my best friends texted me this morning and said it was a young gunna wunna type of day. I think it’s only right I pull this one off the shelf.

Sophomore year of college I lived with 6 dudes in an apartment. One bathroom.

One of my best friends was a Gunna fan. I hadn’t really gotten the hype but I knew it was around. I had a handful of friends that were stuck in slime szn but I had managed to refrain, although I didn’t know why.

My best friend got me on the wave when we found out Drip or Drown 2 came out. I saw he had a song named Derek Fisher and I was sold.

Some of my best friends and I took a class in college that was a breeze. There were a few hunnies in there too that made it all that much worthwhile. I ended up having a huge crush on one of them by the end of the semester.

Something I’ve always admired about one of my boys is he has always gone to the beat of his own drum. He knows his limits and boundaries but is a blast to be around. I can go him about anything – he always has that calm demeanor like a James Bond character. Just all around a cool dude. That said, sometimes he’s just in his own world, almost like a space cadet.

Literally. He said he saw aliens once.

Class had started and my guy was nowhere to be found. About five minutes in, he strolled in with the corded Iphone headphones. One in, one out. You could hear Young Gunna Wunna slipping through the speakers.

The whole class stopped, but he was vibin’. He comes up to me and goes “what you know about that young gunna wunna?!” and dapped me up. A slight hiccup in the class but a day I’ll never forget with one of my absolute best friends in the world.

We’ve been gunna fans/best friends ever since. During COVID we actually got so bored we wrote lyrics to this song and sent them to each other. I really wish I still had that video.

Blessed by ScHoolboy Q

I still can’t believe this song got taken off of streaming.

Monday was filled with a bunch of doomscrolling. Yucky Monday.

During my brain rot, I stumbled on a Tweet from Jon Rothstein. I’ve deleted twitter since for the week, but it was something along the lines of “be grateful for what you have NOW.”

Something I lose sight of often.

This song, man…it’s just so important to me. It’s filled with stories and personal anecdotes Q raps about that I personally cannot relate to, but the overall message is one that resonates with me deeply. I often find myself listening to this on the way home from work. I listened to this after my sister’s tribute. It rocked me.

Kendrick has a verse that gives me chills every time I hear. I’ll edit some of the words for the sake of keeping this clean:

“Yes, my person, you’re blessed
Take advantage, do your best, my person
Don’t stress, you was granted everything inside this planet
Anything you imagine, you possess, my person
You reject these people, that neglect, your respect
For the progress of a baby step, my person
Step, step my person
One, two, skip, skip
Back, back, look both ways
Pull it off the hip”

First, we are absolutely blessed that we have Q and Kendrick on a track together. Second, I’ve felt that my life has been, at times, in a constant state of stopping and stuttering. Kendricks reminder of a baby step is sometimes all you need to get through the day. Storms eventually pass. Sometimes you just need to move where the clouds don’t hover over if/when you can.

It all starts with a baby step and a reminder that the world is at your fingertips if you want it.

Backseat Freestyle by Kendrick Lamar

Sunday scaries hit exponentially different. That said, I’d like to reminisce on a happier time.

Everyone had their liner spot in high school when you couldn’t drive. You were still in that weird part in life where you can’t drive and kind of too old to bike but you still did it. It was like wearing hand me down clothes that didn’t quite fit you.

Ours was the McDonald’s. That night was extraordinary, though, as we were planning our first big high school shindig for New Years.

We waited around anxiously to make plans. One of our buddies had a light bulb moment to hit up one of our friends who had a chill mom that we could for sure sneak some alcohol into.

“hey man can we have a party at your place tonight?”

“uhhh…let me ask my mom. Hey mom can I have people over tonight?”

*faintly in the background* “Absolutely not.”

“Yeah, sure, you guys can come.”

Game on.

We went over and immediately started sending out invites. Our host had a few older siblings who had some alcohol lingering around. Nothing quite like a testosterone filled basement reeking of piss and vinegar that had no idea how to drink, let alone what to do when the girls came over.

One of our buddies had the grand idea to play beer pong on the ping pong table. I partnered up with another lefty and proceeded to play my first ever game of pong. We lost in a shootout. Actually, I don’t even think it was close.

We had this song playing in the background.

The night ended exactly has you might have predicted. The host ended up getting blasted and tried his best to cover it up. He went upstairs when his mom asked “what are you doing?”

“I gotta let my dogs out.” and proceeded to faceplant on the newly fallen snow.

Angel/Better Together (Live) by Jack Johnson

Looking back on it…sophomore year high school summer was an absolute shit show.

I was doing summer baseball, football, and basketball. On top of that I would do baseball tournaments on the weekends in Kenosha. Nothing quite like back to back games with the biggest excitement being passing Mars Cheese Castle on the way to and from.

In hindsight, that summer aged like fine wine. Lots of great memories, but none greater than the Jack Johnson concert with my older brother.

I was racing back from Kenosha to meet him over at Northerly Island (great venue, by the way). My dad dropped me off in travis the Traverse and I finally made it.

I looked up to my brother in more ways than none. One one hand I would quite literally look up to him being 6’4. On the other he always had a great sense of fashion, music, you name it. He’s an adrenaline junkie always looking for the next adventure. He got us tickets and I didn’t look back despite playing in a billion games that day. At the prime age of 15 you just run off hormones. You don’t even need coffee.

I found him with a group and we got a spot at the back right GA stage. He offered me a beer, I refused. I got handed a joint and sent it right back. Looking back there’s something edgy having just the jam and music be your drug of choice for the night. Almost like a nervous energy, but I loved every second of it. We found a random group getting on shoulders and we joined in on the fun.

I didn’t know many of the songs. At many points they would just jam and I didn’t quite know how to dance to the rhythm. I would sway back and fourth feeling like I stuck out like a sore thumb.

Jack saved his best for last, though. One part I love about concerts is when you feel like the songs queued up are just for you. Like there’s a direct tunnel between you and the artist. I heard the chords to Angel and locked in.

I remember listening to the song and reminiscing on all of freshman year of high school. So many great memories it had to offer. I had my first taste of the next chapter in the story, got my first girlfriend, had my first major break up. At 15 that’s the equivalent of a wasp sting that seems like it swells up your whole body but realize it’s just a little scar when you look back on it.

He seamlessly transitioned into his most famous song, Better Together. The whole crowd erupted, singing word for word with my brother and I playing the part.

We took the L home and I could barely keep my eyes open. I had another game back in Kenosha the next day. I remember being in the back of a Chrysler minivan just trying to keep my eyes open.

First words I heard out of the car was “Fay, you’re on the bump.” If you knew anything about me in baseball, you knew I was like a box of chocolates on the mound. You really didn’t know what you were going to get, it was either a solid performance or just an absolute shit show.

That whole time I was on the mound that morning, I had those two songs playing in my head. I pitched the best I had ever pitched that day. I owe it all to my big brother.

Let Me Hold You by Cheat Codes & Dante Klien

Happy Friday, family. 70 and sunny in Chicago today. I mean, stop it.

Something I’ve started to really enjoy being in my mid 20’s is the rave. My friends and I are all going to a concert tonight at the shed which I’m pretty pumped about.

I never thought it was something I’d get into. I was never the first to put EDM in my playlists. However one of my good friends got pretty into it during college. He insisted on being aux at nearly every function. Still does.

I think what I like about it the most is how the EDM vibe brings people together. I have two close close friends that I would never in a million years think a loud bass and some strobe lights would bring us even closer, but here we are.

We went to go visit one of my buddies over in Denver a few years back. He’s an avid raver, it’s never been my thing. However, the energy, the crowd, the whole experience was just electric. Not to mention the fits we had on that night were just absurd.

The power of music, edm in particular, has brought me with some great crowds and some great people. It’s now one of my favorite things to do and I always look forward to the new crowd that comes around.

Anyways, this was one of the first EDM songs I actually put in my playlist. I had first heard it visiting my brother my senior year of high school. It’s been in the rotation ever since.

Have yourselves a friday. Go find a big speaker and blare some edm with your crew.

Magic in the Hamptons by Social House ft. Lil Yachty

Remember that guy I told you about earlier who told me to “stop hitting the ball like a f****** p****?”

Turns out that guys one of my best friends.

We played a little together during high school but our friendship didn’t blossom until after. We’d spend the summers in between coaching for our alma mater as a way to kill time before next season.

He was our backup QB – a little flatfooted but dude could absolutely sling it. Also one of the brightest football minds I’ve been around.

I remember I actually got my license suspended heading into my sophomore year of college (one too many speeding tickets back at G-Vegas) and I made him drive all the way to pick me up before work.

He lived a block away from work.

Anyways, turns out those car rides we started to get pretty close. I guess there was some good that came out of a suspended license after all.

We started working out together over the summer. I was a DB but needed to get some cardio in, so I would run routes while he threw me the rock.

What started out as a summer workout buddy grew to a lifelong friendship in the Spring of 2020.

One day I was drinking a Pilsner, the next I was sent home. My abroad roommate was out that same night. Trump closed the borders and we were done.

The beginning of covid actually felt a lot like when Squidward moves to squidville. The routine of doing nothing with nothing to worry about was nice. All for about 4 days and I started to lose my mind.

That’s when my boy reeder and I had the summer of our lives. We were getting the band back together.

Just us, a ball, a speaker, and the skokie playfields.

We must’ve went out there nearly every day. It was like football was the boogie board we rode in the midst of all the craziness around COVID. It was one of the best times of my life. I’m glad I got to share it with one of my absolute boys.

Anyways, he played this song as an absolute throwback during one of our workout sessions. It always reminds me of a chaotic time, yet we made the most with what we had when all we had was a football field, ball, speaker, and an undersized slot with a flatfooted QB.

Solid Gold by PNAU

If you know me, you know I like to make people laugh. I like to say I have a quirky sense of humor… a quick wit.

For some it takes some time to get used to, for others they would rather I just shut the f*@& up altogether.

However, I came across my neighbor in college who got it right away. I’d say we share that among many other things. She might have a way larger sweet tooth than I do, but we’ve been close ever since.

My second semester of senior year, my core group of friends were fortunate enough to live across a group of gals in Pratt frat. We go on annual trips memorial day every year since post grad.

They say college is a roller coaster, but if you were there for it, second semester at my college was like raging bull at six flags except you didn’t have a seat belt. You were just holding on for dear life not knowing what to expect with COVID rules out the wazoo.

Deep into our last semester, we got word that tides would turn. An email went out that if we got our vaccines they would start lifting some mandates and we wouldn’t be held as hostages anymore.

My friend and I piled into her Acura MDX and headed for our shots. Sun was out, vibes were high, and we took the backroads all the way down.

She played this song on the way there. I had never heard it before, but it was the perfect vibe for a windows down drive.

At this point in the college rollercoaster, it was the equivalent of the slow ride up to the top. We knew the drop was coming, and no matter how bad we wanted to look back, we just enjoyed the last of the ride it had to offer.

We got our shots. We were free.

It also happened to be the first night we were allowed down at our local bars again. Our campus was located on a hill, and I swear it was like the stampede down to try to get any of the last spots on the outdoor patio. I wouldn’t have been surprised if we lost a few soldiers along the way.

Ever since this day, this song has been deep in the rotation ever since. It always reminds me of one of my closest friends, the friends I was able to make across the hall, and those last drops of the college experience I was able to soak in.

Sometimes living on campus all four years has its perks.

Running Out of Time by Tyler the Creator

I still keep in touch with a core group of friends from high school. We go on a summer trip once a year. It’s been a tradition since our freshman year of college. We still go to this day.

We decided to go to Windsor Canada going into our junior year of college. Mainly because the legal drinking age was 19 which was perfect.

It also happened to lineup with the debut of Igor, Tyler’s fifth studio album.

This trip was a little different for me than the debauchery that had occurred in the past. I remember my dad was so mad I was going. “WHY do you need to go to WINDSOR for your trip?!”

Dad…so we can DRINK!

We had a huge heart to heart. He’s been sober for my whole life… We have a little case of the Irish flu that runs in the family.

Even though I was allowed to go, I felt guilty the whole ride up. I made a pact to myself I would tone down on the debauchery for the weekend, almost live alongside the fun while still partaking, but not to the fullest extent.

Anyways, the album dropped I believe on a Saturday. Tyler sent out a warning that the best way to listen would be front to back with no skips. This would also not be like any of his previous work.

And he was right — it was better. Way better actually.

I will admit though, the first listen was confusing. I pulled up a chair on a dock that looked out on a grey lake out in Windsor and let the tracks run its course.

The album kicked off with the song he had rolled out with which was IGOR’S THEME. I remember watching the skit in my college dorm with all of Tyler’s yellow heads over the buzzing intro, with one peaking its head out just enough for you to notice it moving to the drums. Honestly, the rollout of the album was awesome between that and him falling off the ladder in A BOY IS A GUN.

Anyways, I sat out on that lawn chair on the dock and listened front to back. I didn’t really click for me at the time. I was expecting a combination of raps and bars, but rather got a story. A deep dive into Tyler’s love life. I love when artists take that leap into doing their thing. It’s like he’s had this in his back pocket his whole discography and finally felt comfortable enough to pull it out and share with the world.

It’s a beautiful album through and through. When I got back from Windsor I got really taking my dog on some long walks to kill the time while I was home and when I got to go back to school. Me and Brad man bumped a lot of IGOR that summer. I look back on that fondly.

Do Better by Ab-Soul

One of my favorite parts of music is the fact that you can follow an artist’s discography and see exactly where they’re at in life. Each album serves as a blueprint for their current state. If you put enough of them together, you can notice a few common themes between the bunch.

Take Tyler the Creator, Schoolboy Q, Mac Miller, and Ab-Soul for example. If you look at their work in chronological order, they all follow the same common themes: start out as chaotic (in Tyler’s case shock culture. Dude was rappin about some wild shit),rapping about the lavish lifestyle that comes with fame at a young age. Drugs, sex, you name it. But as time goes by, you notice they all gradually start to move to music on reflection/peace. Their voices, sounds, lyrics, themes all change. Some even start to sing. They grow out of their old shells and move to their wiser, older selves.

It’s fascinating to see the yin and yang of music and how it coincides with the way of life. Those who want chaos eventually want peace.

I’m happy to see that Ab-Soul is now thankfully in a peaceful state. For a long time, it certainly wasn’t that way.

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One of my best friends is getting married in a few weeks. He got a place back up in the burbs so I decided to go visit him. We watched a severance for 6 hours straight… one of my favorite nights I’ve had in a long time. I headed up around 1am.

I had this song on repeat the whole way home.

I’m not perfect by any means. The repetitive nature of the chorus does a great job of reminding me that. It’s something I say to myself often.

We all have our flaws, vices, habits. Some easier to share than others.

Right now I’m great – I’m “back” if you will, in this very moment. But these last few months, year, even years in a lot of ways, have been very hard.

I haven’t dealt with those hardships in the greatest of ways. I’ve let a few things linger. I’ve realized some of the greatest qualities about me sometimes bring out my worst habits. I’ve let my bad habits write checks that I’ve had to cash out on my behalf way too many times.

But, like all things, life goes on, and this too shall pass.

At this point in my life I feel the connection between the albums mentioned above. I’m fortunate enough to say I’m at a point where I can put the chaos aside and seek peace. I think the more battle scars I wear the more clear the picture becomes. It’s all about just putting thought into action.

Anyways, it’s comforting to know even my most streamed artists have their battles. Mr. Soul is one of the best to do it when it comes to wordplay.

Just another reminder that we’re never alone. You’re never alone.